L.M.H, 40, in Dong Nai province, came to see a doctor to ask for his advice on what she needs to do to have a son. 

The woman said she has three children, but they are all daughters and she wants a son now. Her husband is the only son of the family, and he has the duty of giving birth to a son, who will be in charge of worshipping the ancestors of the great family.

The woman said she was aware of the risk she would face if she gives birth once more. However, the husband has threatened to divorce her if she refuses the parturition.

Both H and her husband are factory workers with modest monthly incomes, however, H said she will borrow money to use medical intervention service to have a son.

At the age of 40, D.L.T in HCM City is still dreaming of giving birth to a son. She said she must have both son and daughter to ‘keep the family happy’.

As T thought that the domestic medical service was not good enough, she and her husband decided to go to Singapore and register the service for screening the fetus’ gender. The prenatal test showed that she was carrying a baby boy. During her pregnancy, she traveled between Vietnam and Singapore.

But finally, the baby she expected was another girl. Her husband was so disappointed and repeatedly asked the doctor if the girl was really his child. By that time, the couple had paid VND600 million for the service and travel costs between the two countries.

Later, they decided to order the service in Thailand. She had a difficult pregnancy period as faced prediabetes and metabolic disorders. However, she did not care because the doctor was sure that this was a boy fetus.

But unfortunately, the boy was born prematurely at the 27th week. Despite great efforts, the child died after two weeks.

Dr Nguyen Viet Quang from the Central Obstetrics Hospital (Hanoi) confirmed with VietNamNet that he usually receives couples who come to ask for help to give birth to a baby boy.

Meanwhile, a high number of couples said they are ready to spend VND11-20 million to have NIPT (Non-invasive prenatal testing) to find out the gender of fetuses.

With the strong development of genetic testing technology, it is feasible to know the gender of fetuses on their third day. Many couples want to use the testing, though it is illegal.

Dr Nguyen Huu Trung, a lecturer at the HCM City University of Medicine and Pharmacy, said he has always been asked how to get a baby boy. 

When giving advice to couples, he always points out the risks the couples have to face and stresses that the success probability rate in IVF is just 50 percent. However, many women still decide to risk their lives to make another attempt. 

For many families, having sons is an obligation of the wives. They are threatened with divorce if they cannot give birth to sons. In many cases, couples order a D and C if they find out that they were going to have a baby girl.

Consequences are serious

The Ministry of Health has repeatedly warned of the postpartum gender imbalance in Vietnam with the ratio of 112.1 boys per 100 girls.

Professor Nguyen Dinh Cu, Chair of the Scientific Council of the Institute for Population, Family and Children Research, said sex imbalance at birth will cause serious economic and health consequences.

The first risk is that men will find it difficult to get married. Since there are more men and women, a certain number of men, especially poor and disadvantageous ones, won’t be able to find a wife for them. Once many men stay single, the standard family structure (wife-husband, parents-children) will be broken.

Vietnam should learn from experience of other regional countries, such as China and South Korea. If Vietnam cannot solve its problem well, it may have to ‘import’ wives.

The second risk is the spread of sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV/AIDS. Because of the excess of men over women, many men won’t be able to have a wife, which may lead to the increase in extramarital sex.

Thirdly, the imbalance between men and women may lead to increase in woman trafficking and big impact on employment.

Linh Giao