The family has always been a source of pride for P.D.D, born in 1990, from Hai Duong. Recently, she posted a photo of her extended family gathered together on an ancestor’s death anniversary with captions about their tradition and roots.

“At these moments, I’m always grateful and happy to be born into such a ‘super huge’ family. A house full of kids is really great,” D. wrote.

The post received a lot of engagement from the online community. Many left comments expressing admiration for the beautiful tradition and the unity of this great family.

Speaking with VietNamNet reporters, D said the photo showed over 200 members at the ancestral home.

D. shared that her great-grandparents had 11 children, and her grandfather was the sixth. Then, her grandparents had 5 children, with her father being the second.

“The other children of the great-grandparent also had many kids and grandkids, some had 7, some had 8. The next generations got married and had kids, grandkids, and great-grandkids… bringing the total number of members to nearly 500,” D. said.

Her great-grandparent passed away nearly 40 years ago. The death anniversary ceremony is organized every year, and every family sends one member to the event.

However, every 5 years or so, the great family holds a massive anniversary celebration, which becomes a “grand family reunion.” The feast is organized meticulously, with detailed plans and a clear schedule.

“The most recent big anniversary was in 2023, when my family prepared over 100 feast tables, and the eating stretched over two days,” D. recalled.

D.’s family created a group chat named “Gia Dinh Cu”. A few months before the anniversary, a committee of elders holds a separate meeting to draft initial plans. Then, the agenda and schedule are shared in the group chat.

Upon hearing the news, family members near and far, including those living abroad, arrange their schedules to come together.

“The ceremony lasts two days, on the weekend closest to the official anniversary date. The afternoon before, the kids and grandkids set up tents, a stage, food…etc, mostly directed and arranged by the elders. The next morning, all family members and invited guests gather to join the feast,” D. explained.

Typical activities during the ancestor’s death anniversary include a family representative giving a speech, talks about the family’s origins, invited guests speaking about village culture, and kids and grandkids taking commemorative photos.

“The most fun part is taking pictures of the great family. To get that many people into one frame, the photographer had to spend a full 30 minutes arranging everyone. Once everything was set, people sat in their assigned spots from a pre-made list. 

“Some handled seating, some directed the serving of tables, some checked the dishes. Everything was incredibly smooth and coordinated,” D said.

D’s family members live close together, and everyone’s yards are spacious, so setting up hundreds of feast tables at once isn’t a problem. The bustling atmosphere, the joy, and the excitement are what D remembers most from each anniversary.

Pride

Growing up in such a large family, D has encountered plenty of funny and awkward moments. Sometimes she can’t remember everyone’s names, and other times she feels shy in front of faces that seem “both strange and familiar.”

That’s why her grandparents want to hold the big gatherings, so the kids and grandkids can recognize each other and strengthen their bond.

“There was once an incident in my family where two young people didn’t know they were related and dated each other. Later, when they dug deeper and realized they couldn’t be together, they had to break up,” she said.

“That’s why the elders in my family always say we need to meet up, know who’s who, so we can recognize each other out in the world,” D added.

The great family runs a scholarship fund, and every year they hold an award ceremony for the little ones who excel in school.

“I’m really proud to live in an extended family that’s so united and loving,” D. said.

Thanh Minh